LGBT+ History Month: Words matter

For LGBT+ History Month, Gordon Lennox WS, Director at Macdonald Henderson and a Law Society Council member, reflects on his experience growing up gay in the 1970s and '80s, how times have changed for the LGBT+ community, and why 'coming out' needs to be consigned to history.

Growing up in the '70s and spending my teenage years predominantly in the '80s, LGBT rights were something that were still in the future.

Being gay was not something that was spoken about, let alone being open about your sexuality. Add to the mix that I grew up in a small village in West central Scotland - it was much easier just to be ‘one of the lads’. Any indication that you may be a bit different and very quickly you were singled out and the object of ridicule and bullying.

Whereas today, younger people are quite comfortable talking about their sexuality and sexual orientation, back then I think I was aware of being different, but not really sure in what way I was different. You have to remember that sex education was, more or less, non existent back then. Such things were rarely, if ever, spoken about. It was a mixture of the unknown, of fear, of shame, so it was easier just to try and fit in.

The thought that you may confide in a friend or ask your parents did not even figure in any contemplation. No, no, just better to say nothing and carry on.

It did not help that in 1981, the AIDS pandemic was declared in the US and with that came the vilification of the gay community. Mainstream media took up the banner and it was entrenched that gay people were evil and disease ridden.

A frenzy of lurid headlines left the public in no doubt and the general mood was, if not hostile, certainly against those who identified as gay. On the back of that, there was absolutely no chance that ‘coming out’ was going to be a smart move or an option.

Another dilemma is, once we have told people of our sexual orientation in our social or family circle, does that automatically extend to our working life too? As the actor, Andrew Scott, recently notes in a newspaper interview “some people aren’t lucky enough to be accepted by their family” and, I would add, by their friends or colleagues either for that matter.

I know for many, me included, this has been a dilemma. Fear of it holding them back or how it would be received by an employer and colleagues.

Thankfully change comes, sometimes slowly and sometimes quickly, but it comes nonetheless. And when it comes to the LGBT+ community, that change has been gradual but it has been change in the right direction, for the most part.

It took until 2010 for the Equality Act to come in to place to offer some protection. I had various ‘jobs’ prior to my legal career and in none of those was my employer aware of my sexuality. Growing up in the mindset of not telling stayed with me.

It was not until I joined the legal profession, did I make the conscious decision that I would be ‘open’ about it. Has it held me back? Not that I am aware.

There have been a few interesting moments. I did interview for a role once and was asked about my family situation. This was after the person interviewing said he did not want to employ a woman as they just “go off and get pregnant”. I said I had no children and lived with my husband. Spluttering and with eyes almost popping out his head, the interviewer inquired “you mean you live with a bloke?”. “Yes”, I said. The interview terminated about 10 seconds later and needless to say I never got the job.

Thankfully, it was a one-off occurrence and hopefully such things are not common place, but no doubt in our profession there have been dinosaurs and I am sure there are still a few lurking. Others I am sure may have had similar experiences, but nonetheless we have come a long way in the past 40 years, from the '80s, when I was a teenager.

As I write this in 2024, the phrase ‘coming out’, that I used earlier, seems so ridiculous, but sadly one we still hear. It is as if we still have to confess. I confess that I am gay. I confess that I am straight. I confess that I eat biscuits. It is all preposterous, because it shouldn’t matter a jot if I am gay or straight or eat biscuits. It is simply nobody’s business, yet we feel compelled that we have to inquire or be inquired of. General assumptions are still made – ‘what does your wife do?’ or phrases like ‘you and your good lady’. Whilst we have come a long way, there is still much to do.

The Law Society has done sterling work when it comes to LGBT+ rights and it continues to do so, promoting diversity and inclusion in the profession.

A friend of mine was born with a problem with their spine and, as a result, they are not very tall. They once said to me that they were not joining the club for 4ft high people just to fight for equality for people who are 4ft high. Their logic being, if we need a group to tell people we’re different in order to fight for equality, it is almost paradoxical. The ultimate goal is that everyone, regardless, of sexual orientation or disability or whatever the characteristic is, is just equal as a matter of course rendering any groups not required. That is still far in the future.

If you had told me back then that, today, I would be writing a few words for LGBT+ History Month and that those words were to be published, I would have laughed and said that will never happen. But here it is.